It’s really just hitting me now, tomorrow, I’ll be starting my journey for camp, and the day after I’ll arrive at camp, a few short hours a head of the campers.
It feels like being thrown in the deep-end – OK I’ve had training, I know in my head I can do it, but there’s still that element of fear! What if I get a group of kids that don’t get on with each other? Or I get some kids that just want to wind me up?
It’s the fear of the unknown, I was a trainee last year, which was nice. It was like hey look! I get all the benefits of being a leader, and next to none of the responsibility! Now, I get all of the responsibility as well and it’s like “uhhh… you SURE you want me doing this? really?”
I feel like I’m stepping out of the pot, and into the fire. I’m a little scared (doesn’t happen often) because I don’t want to mess up camp for these kids, I’ve had great leaders all the way through camp, I still remember all of them very well, and now I’m going to have to step up to their level, and it feels like a big step.
Have you ever revisited family, friends or places you haven’t seen since you where a kid? Everything seemed really big back then, and then all of a sudden, it all seems so small… what interested you for hours back then, is just a passing interest. Everything changes, even the things that are still the same.
Well, I was nervous, slightly panicked, however, now I’m calm, collected maybe even excited. Hows the change come about? Well, I remembered one of my favourite verses (looked it up on-line)
New Century Version (NCV)2 When you pass through the waters, I will be with you.
When you cross rivers, you will not drown.
When you walk through fire, you will not be burned,
nor will the flames hurt you.
I know God’s going to be with me at camp, that He’ll be watching out for me, God’s got my back. So I don’t need to worry, I just need to finish my packing, tidy my room and go to work. Every aspect of my life has been planned out by God. Why would he let me mess it up now? I’m just going to do my best, follow my training and trust in God. There’s no other way, there is no need for another way.
Cheers for reading, please pray for me over the next 2 weeks at camp that God doesn’t have any surprises coming my way, and if He does, that He’ll help me remember Isaiah 43:2.