Without my laptop, and games to distract me, I appear to have nothing better to do than blog. Suits me fine.
Genesis 14. It’s a bit of an effort to read. I struggled to get through it and maintain the narrative. Keeping all the bits going in your head is hard, as there are many names and places.
It starts off with a list of names and places. I’m in the mood for some creative paraphrasing, So I’ll give you a run down.
First up we’ve got Amraphel, King of Babylonia (a City). We’ll call him Raphael. Second into the arena is Arioch was king of Ellasar, lets call him, say, Michealangelo (you make detect a pattern at this point). Third we have “Kedorlaomer was king of Elam” No attempts at reading that out loud. We’ll simplify that down to Leo, or Leonardo. The final King is called Tidal, he’s king of Goiim. I like the name Tidal, it seems a solid name, I imagine it would discribe somebody unchanging. (snicker) So I’m not replacing it.
On the BLUE TEAM we’ve got another group of kings. Bera, king of Sodom, AKA Rich, Birsha, king of Gomorrah, renamed on crowning to “Shaaawn“(you pronounce it like you where shouting at somebody called Sean). Shinab, king of Admah. Seems a bit of a “nab” so I’m going to call him Mike(INJOKEEEEEE). Shemeber king of Zeboiim – Bob. Finaly, we have the mysterious king of Bela, he is, you could say, denied a name, so lets call him Denile (in jokes galore, unfortunately I don’t think any of the people involved read this blog…)
The kings mentioned here didn’t rule nations, but cites/ city states.
We’re given a bit of a side light, it would seem, once upon a time, all of these kings worked together. They have quite the history of conquoring and pillaging. However, team purple disbanded after 13 years.
They have some match posturing, in a militery sense. It takes them a year of squaring up but then they agree a time and place, as “gentlemen” (or a first year kid getting beaten up by a ned) will do.
Match their armies up, get organised, dig some pits and fill them full of burning tar – seems they had a sense for the theatrical, although they did come in handy… (well the pits of tar where there already, and not on fire, but I have a sense of theatrical, I’ll be selling the movie rights to this soon enough I’m sure)
Well, things go well for the under dogs. The red team send the blue team packing. Rich and Shaaawn are sent packing first off, or atleast, they run away. Some of their troops run into the flaming tar pits (you know, the ones that aren’t actually on fire?)
So Rafa is like “LOL fools, left their cities unguarded… I’ll go capture them before they come back… do some looting, you know the usual weekday in London.” (Too soon? Didn’t think so)
So he loots Sodom and Gomorrah, taking everything, including the food (like that gangsta guy in London who stole basmatii rice…). They also took Lot, and everything he owned. Kinda awkward for him I guess. He probably shouldn’t have moved so far away from Abram. Tough luck now though. He seems kinda screwed now.
Abram’s spy network finds out about this (by which I mean he heard it in passing from some guy in the pub, or however it worked in those days). He decided to get his boys together, the tanks, the bombers. By which I mean 318 armed mean, who’d been born at his camp (so they where quite young men. Prime of their youth, the tough guys.)
They found the enemy, and chased them to the town of Dan. Where they stopped, and prepared to fight them off.
Abram reigns in his troups, and gets thinking. Stratagey is the easiest way to win a war – thats why the romans where so effective a thousdand or so years later – they had strategy and good military training. Like Abram and his boys.
That night, when Rafa (and the rest of team red) and the lads are sleeping, Abram splits his men into covert groups, they sneak in to the village, probably killing the guards on the way in, assassins creed style. The kill some more of them, and then as they wake up, and start running, they chase them down some more. Before getting bored and getting Lot, all of his stuff (and doing some of their own looting and pillaging no doubt).
After they’ve chilled out a bit Rich, the king of Sodom (which is one of the armies that ran away at the start) is all like, “cheers Abram for helping me, have all of the stuff you took back, and keep it, cause like, I don’t want to start a fight with you about it, so if I say you can have it, I’ll save some face.” I don’t think he would have put it like that though.
Abram is all like “… No way dude. I’m not going to have you going around saying. ‘See Abram? He got rich because of me, really, I taught him everything he knows etc etc’ You can have it all back, but give some of the stuff to the guys who helped you out. Since your a good lad and all”
So this is a pretty epic story, it has war and fighting, it’s all manly and dramatic (could totally write a book with these guys as key characters… but not today). What is there to learn from that? Well, the only references to God, are at the end
“22 But Abram said to the king of Sodom, “I make a promise to the Lord, the God Most High, who made heaven and earth.23 I promise that I will not keep anything that is yours. I will not keep even a thread or a sandal strap so that you cannot say, ‘I made Abram rich.’24 I will keep nothing but the food my young men have eaten. But give Aner, Eshcol, and Mamre their share of what we won, because they went with me into battle.” (I don’t know who those three are.. but they where probably Abrams captains, and where in charge of groups of men)
I’m going to go out on a limb, and say that Abram was a proud man, I think that he was proud because God has choosen him – out of everybody else he’d ever known, to be the Father of a nation. He clearly (hopefully) wants to be able to say that what he has is given by God, not by man.
I think that’s quite awesome. I know I’ve got to where I am in life because my parents have supported me, but I like to think that when I hit 65+ (maybe a tad sooner) I’ll have moved out from under my parents wings, and have earned my place in the world, God willing of course.
In terms of a challenge, think about the things God has given you in life – maybe not material things, but maybe good friends – I’m starting to realise how blessed I am by my friends. A happy family? Thats a true blessing that those who have often take for granted. Maybe you are finacially secure.
Look at what you have. Thank God for giving it to you, it’s something I’m pretty poor at doing, so over the next few days, I think I’ll be more focused on thanking God for giving me a laptop to use in the first place, and not raging at Him for taking it away/ reducing it’s usefulness.
Thanks for reading. God bless.