It’s been a few days since my last post, which seems to be a bit of an improvement on a few weeks! I can hardly believe that I was posting twice a day at somepoints during the summer, back before Uni started.
I’m really fairly busy these days, I’ve classes 4/5 days a week, CU small groups on Monday then the pub quiz right after, unfortunately classes first thing on Tuesday means no more Quiz- Hive combo. and the main meeting on Thursday. Other days involve other tasks as well, including a large amount of gaming, and a fair amount of coursework as well.
Sometimes when life is really busy, it’s hard to find some time to spend reflectively. I feel like I’ve been rushing around doing so much that I’ve not had enough time to spend with God. It’s a tough feeling – you know what is right, and then there is what you want to do as well… My minister Jeremy was talking about that on Sunday morning, and it really struck home. I’ve sat through hundreds of sermons, no exaggeration. Many of them have been all about “making the choice” and “not having a foot on each side of the line”. I’ve always felt that they were aimed at somebody else, and not really applicable for me. On Sunday it was different. However more about that later. Now it’s time to turn to Genesis 28.
This is a busy time for our man Jacob as well. He’s moving out! A difficult time for anybody, sent to live with his distant relatives, and told not to come home till he’s married. He has it alot rougher that his old man Isaac did, since Abraham got a wife delivered to Isaac, Jacob has to go and find his own!
When Jacob is on his journey God calls him. This calling comes when Jacob is busy doing something else – sleeping! But that’s no issue for God. He passes on His message to Jacob through a dream.
Now I don’t sleep often, but when I do, I sleep like a log. Nothing wakes me up, the number of times I’ve fallen asleep in a public room at home, or at an SU camp, and woken up with pen on my face is a bit ridiculous.
So when I see God speaking to Jacob even while he’s asleep, I’m pretty impressed!
O.K. God’s called Jacob, now how does he respond? there are two options here; Jacob could ignore God, or he could listen up, and get to task. The easy way and the hard way.
It’s easy to ignore God, and just do what you want, I feel the temptation to do that all time. Sometimes it’s tempting to go out and get so drunk I don’t really have to deal with other people’s messes. It’s tempting to turn around to somebody asking for my help and say “no way I’m busy, I don’t care what you have to say, or what you need me to do.” It’s tempting to have a long lie on Sunday mornings and skip church, or to hang out with my friends on Sunday nights, rather than go to the evening service. (Not that skipping church is a sin, it’s just helpful to meet with other Christians)
The other option Jacob has it to listen to what God has to say. It’s not an easy path, Jacob will have plenty of challenges and trials ahead. It isn’t going to be easy. Jacob recognises what God is offering him. He says “Alright then Lord, if you provide me with what I need, and look after me, then I’ll say thank you by dedicating my life to you, and offering back 10% of what you give me”
That whole dedicating his life bit, is kinda tough to get you’re head round. It’s saying every aspect, every part of my life, I give to you, I’m going to live it in a way that will please you, and honour you.
That’s tough, because there are things I like doing which I don’t always do in a Christian manor, for example, when I’m gaming, I tend to get a bit sketchy in the language I use, and I maybe get a little bit frustrated with other people, more than I should. There’s plenty of other examples, but that’s the one that leaps out at me right now.
It’s tough because gaming is my biggest hobby, I spend more time gaming and “studying” the games I play then I do on just about anything else, I’m sure that isn’t healthy and all that jazz, but it’s still true.
It’s tough because I’m at the point where I have to decide, and decision I’ve made countless times, although not always the same way. I’m decided that God is the biggest factor in my life, and now it’s a struggle to motivate myself to show it in the way I live. I have to change my life to reflect that.
Living life to reflect my beliefs. It’s not easy, it’s difficult, and there are area I still need to work on, Everybody does.
So, my challenge for myself is to work on my attitude towards gaming. My challenge to YOU is to think about where is your relationship with God lacking? Is it lacking because you refuse to admit it exists? Think about the biggest area where it’s lacking, and think about how you’re going to change it.
Life is not a mystery. Life is living for God.